Author: Ryan Ozawa

The Power of the Web

The Power of the Web

The Internet can bring about many wonderful, magical things, but nothing is quite as heartwarming as when it facilitates the smackdown of a dumbass. The Story: A Ford SVT dealer technician takes a customer’s 2003 Cobra on a 140 m.p.h. joyride. He brags about it on a Mustang message board...

Open Letter to Casey Choi

Open Letter to Casey Choi

Dear Casey Choi, Candidate for Hawaii State Senate District 11: You don’t know me, but you wave at me twice a day. I don’t wave back, and feel a little bad, so I thought I’d tell you why. I represent a small constituent group of little strategic value, but one...

Bring Back Pie

Bring Back Pie

If a meme washes ashore in the uncharted backwaters of the Internet known as DIARY-L, then I know it’s being beaten to death. It used to be All Your Base. Now, it’s, “When come back, bring pie.” Simply because it was a mystery to me, I feel compelled to post...

Improbable

Improbable

Or perhaps simply inevitable. My beautiful wife, who had to be dragged kicking and screaming into the world of web journaling (and now writes more often than I do), also now has a weblog. Though only time will tell if “Aside” will flourish, I suspect Jen will soon be blogging...

Unglued

Unglued

Of all the… okay, now I know the record labels are really getting desperate. “Writers receiving review copies of two soon-to-be-released albums … are finding the CD’s already inside Sony Walkman players that have been glued shut.” What’ll they think of next?  [Via MeFi]

An Icon is Born

An Icon is Born

It’s been found. A cyber-archaeological undertaking that rivals any of the pick-and-shovel variety has struck paydirt: the first, honest-to-goodness appearance of the ASCII “smiley.” And you better get out those cards and cameras: his (or her?) twentieth birthday is September 19. Awesome. It took some research, an ancient 9-track tape...

Splat!

Splat!

Like Roger Ebert, I’m a fan of Rotten Tomatoes. It’s like those little “major reviews at a glance” tables some newspapers and magazines compile, but fortified with the power of the web. You can see at a glance whether a movie is an across-the-board hit, a mixed-bag, or a bomb....

Domain of Disappointment

Domain of Disappointment

You snooze, you lose, right? I already own far too many internet domain names (thinking right now, I can’t even name them all), but for ages I’d been meaning to pick up kilinahe.com for Jen (and by extension, Katie). Kilinahe was Jen’s Hawaiian name for her Hawaiian 101 class at...

Finally

Finally

A little note to offer a great big welcome to Mitchell, who has, after incessant nagging and pleading, finally joined the booming ranks of escribitionists with his journal, “Chalkdust.” “I’m going to work myself through this time in my life as I try to figure what’s important and what I’m...

U-Haul Does Hawaii

U-Haul Does Hawaii

Turns out the Aloha State was one of twenty-seven “Venture Across America” destinations featured recently by U-Haul. The Hawaii section — which, like all the others, features a pretty well-done Flash feature — includes a coloring book and computer wallpaper. Notably, the main presentation focuses on the “alien invasion” — the...

It was a Dark and Stormy Night

It was a Dark and Stormy Night

The 2002 winners of the Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest — which recognizes exceptionally bad writing — were announced yesterday. I love these awards… the literary equivalent to Black’s “Worst-Dressed List.” While an Oakland woman (Ms. Rephah Berg) took top honors, my favorite among the finalists was Mr. Charles Howland of St....

Towers and Shadows

Towers and Shadows

Plans are expected to be revealed today that outline several possible uses of the former site of the World Trade Center in lower Manhattan. “The plans include from two to six office towers, some topped by glass-clad see-through structures, several hundred feet high, to evoke the twin towers. Several include...

Overhaul

Overhaul

Well! Have a baby and you do all sorts of wacky things. You fall asleep standing in the kitchen. You come up with whole new measurement systems to make the amount of time slept in the last week sound really long. And you get sick, get wired on cold medicine,...

Hey! Saturday is Towel Day! Too bad it’s not a weekday. I would’ve loved to shared the occasion with my coworkers. I will have to be sure to have my towel with me… and perhaps my digital camera.

As if I wasn’t busy enough. What was I thinking? I should never have started. Next thing I know, I couldn’t back out, and I couldn’t not finish before I left for Kuala Lumpur. I wonder if this is my subconscious’ way of dealing with my oft-explained fear of flying?...

Monday, April 29 UA 827 Departs Honolulu (HNL) April 29 at 10:20 a.m. – Time: 8 hrs., 5 mins. UA 827 Arrives Narita (NRT) April 30 at 1:25 p.m. (6:25 p.m. April 29 HST) – Time: 4 hrs., 30 mins. UA 897 Departs Narita (NRT) April 30 at 5:55 p.m....

Peril of Parenting #2215: It’s 11:43 a.m. on a lazy Saturday, and my daughter Katie has now, for the sixth time, run up to my wife’s computer and played the same song (“Spread A Little Aloha” by The Mana`o Company). Even a cute song like that can drive you up...

Fascinating. A local prank (unleashed on the islands in 1959) made the list of the Top Ten April Fool’s Day Hoaxes of All Time. Dubbed the “Hawaiian Tax Refund,” the announcement (made by an unnamed radio station) claimed that all Hawaii residents would get their entire income tax for the...